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		<title>inappropriate dinner conversation: the curious case of the Cherokee Freedmen</title>
		<link>http://www.bonvivantonline.com/2011/09/19/inappropriate-dinner-conversation-the-curious-case-of-the-cherokee-freedmen/</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 19 Sep 2011 23:28:04 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description><![CDATA[The year is 1983. 6 men arrive at a voting precinct in Oklahoma. The men are of varying ages and statures, but there is at least one trait that they all share. They are all black. As they approach the door of the precinct, their leader, a Reverend called Nero, issues a quick word of [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://media.photobucket.com/image/black indians/dopper0189/BlackIndians.jpg?o=6" target="_blank"><img class="aligncenter" style="border: 4px solid black;" src="http://i993.photobucket.com/albums/af52/dopper0189/BlackIndians.jpg" border="0" alt="" width="320" height="240" /></a></p>
<p>The year is 1983. 6 men arrive at a voting precinct in Oklahoma. The men are of varying ages and statures, but there is at least one trait that they all share. They are all black. As they approach the door of the precinct, their leader, a Reverend called Nero, issues a quick word of encouragement to his band of braves. The men steady their nerves and their resolves. Not one of them is sure what may happen next.</p>
<p>It only takes a few moments for it to all be over. The men return to their vehicles, not a single vote cast among them. They have been turned away from the polls this day for the simple fact that only citizens of this nation are allowed to vote. And, because they are black, these men are not considered citizens.</p>
<p>Though the details in the story above were imagined, the story itself is very much based on actual events that happened in these United States in the far, far away state of Oklahoma in the long ago time of 1983.</p>
<p>The men in the story are descendants of a little-known group of people referred to as the Black Freedmen. Once owned<a href="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/black-indians.jpeg"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-3356" style="margin: 10px;" title="black-indians" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/black-indians.jpeg" alt="black indians - a hidden heritage" width="226" height="378" /></a> as slaves by wealthy and usually mixed-race Cherokees, the Black Freedmen were emancipated and granted full citizenship in the Cherokee Nation in an 1866 treaty between the Cherokees and the US government. Since then, the Black Freedmen’s story of equal acceptance into the Cherokee Nation has been a twisted one fraught with legal entanglements, questions of culture and identity, and sturdy allegations of fraud and good ol’ American racism.</p>
<p>I’d really never heard of the Black Freedmen until a Facebook friend of mine shared an <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/44516027/ns/us_news-life/#.TnE41-z0rjY">article from MSNBC</a> outlining the most recent in a long history of legal battles between the Black Freedmen and the Cherokee Nation. Like many of you might have, I’d heard stories of Blacks and Natives intermarrying and having children together, but I never knew that there was an established and officially recognized group of Blacks that were considered Cherokees – by blood or by naturalization. I’d venture to say it was left out of my required history classes as a young lass.</p>
<p>But after reading the article, it quickly turned from a curious little historical sidenote, into a current-day political conundrum that threatens the concepts of sovereignty and democracy that define our modern government, and brings back into focus basic civil rights issues that, before now, I naively believed had long ago been put to rest in this country.</p>
<p>After a little research, I was able to piece together the following timeline of the Black Freedman’s history from various sources (Gawd, I love the Internets!).</p>
<div id="callout">
<p><strong>1863 </strong>– Cherokee Nation officially abolishes slavery; Some Cherokees who side with the Confederacy continue to hold slaves and fight against the Union in the Civil War</p>
<p><strong>1866</strong> – The Cherokees sign a treaty with post-Civil war US government extending Cherokee citizenship and enfranchisement rights to the freedmen and their descendants. The Cherokee Nation Constitution is amended to reflect the treaty’s language concerning freedmen’s rights.</p>
<p><strong>1880 </strong>– The Cherokee Nation conducts a census to assist with the distribution of proceeds from sales of Cherokee land. Cherokee freedmen are excluded from the census and thereby, the distribution of proceeds.</p>
<p><strong>1888 </strong>– US government passes <em>An Act to secure to the Cherokee Freedmen and others their proportion of certain proceeds of lands.</em></p>
<p><strong>1896 </strong>– US government commissions the <a title="Kern-Clifton roll (page does not exist)" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Kern-Clifton_roll&amp;action=edit&amp;redlink=1">Kern-Clifton roll</a> to identify Cherokee Freedmen that were entitled to Cherokee land sale proceeds. The Kern-Clifton roll identifies 5,600 Cherokee Freedmen.</p>
<p><strong>1902-1906</strong> – The Dawes Commission, enacted by the US government, requires registration of American Indians. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tvygBH9TrME">The Dawes Rolls</a> classifies individuals as either: Indians by blood, intermarried whites, or Freedmen. Dawes commissioners generally listed all visibly black people as freedmen regardless of Cherokee blood ancestry that would have otherwise qualified some as ‘Indians by blood’. The Dawes roll lists 4,924 Freedmen.</p>
<p><strong>1970s </strong>- Under pressure from Indian activists, the Bureau of Indian Affairs (BIA) begins to provide certain benefits, such as free health care, to members of federally recognized tribes. As citizens, Cherokee Freedmen are also eligible for benefits.</p>
<p><strong>1983 </strong>- Ross O. Swimmer, then Principal Chief of the Cherokee Nation, issues an executive order requiring Cherokee Nation citizens to have a &#8220;Certificate of Degree of Indian Blood&#8221; (CDIB) card in order to vote. CDIB cards were issued by the BIA based on those listed on the Dawes Rolls as ‘Indians by blood’. Rev. Robert H. Nero and 5 other Cherokee Freedmen are turned away from polls when they attempt to vote in the 1983 tribal election.</p>
<p><strong>1984 </strong>– Rev. Nero and his associates file a class action lawsuit on the basis of racial discrimination against the United States, the Office of the President, the Department of the Interior, the Bureau of Indian Affairs, the tribal election committee, and Principal Chief Ross Swimmer.</p>
<p><strong>1989 </strong>– The court rules against Rev. Nero and fellow plaintiffs, citing jurisdictional issues.</p>
<p><strong>2001 </strong>- Bernice Riggs, a Freedmen descendant, sues the tribal registrar for citizenship based on blood ancestry. The Judicial Appeals Tribunal (now the Cherokee Nation Supreme Court) rules that Riggs adequately documented her Cherokee blood ancestry, but ultimately denies Riggs citizenship because her ancestors were listed only as Freedmen on the Dawes Rolls, not as ‘Indians by blood’.</p>
<p><strong>2006 </strong>- The Cherokee Nation Supreme Court rules in favor of Freedman descendant Lucy Allen. The ruling concludes that acts barring Freedmen descendants from tribal membership are unconstitutional , since the 1975 Cherokee Constitution did not exclude Freedmen from citizenship, nor did it have a blood requirement for membership in the tribe.</p>
</div>
<p>And this is where the real fun begins.</p>
<p><span id="more-3351"></span></p>
<p>After generations of being bounced back and forth between Cherokee and non-Cherokee statuses, the Black Freedmen finally regained their constitutional rights as Cherokee citizens in 2006. But before the Freedman could even get out a rousing refrain of ‘We Shall Overcome’, what happened?</p>
<p>The Cherokees changed the Constitution.</p>
<p>Damn.</p>
<p>In a series of political moves with dubious ethical connotations, high-ranking Cherokee leaders swiftly drafted a petition for a special election that would allow the Cherokee Constitution to be amended to exclude Black Freedmen as citizens. Despite accusations by some tribal leaders that <a title="protest-forged Cherokee signatures" href="http://www.cornsilks.com/protest.html" target="_blank">signatures on the petition were forged</a>, the required signatures were obtained, and in 2007, the Cherokee Nation voted to expel the Freedmen from the nation.</p>
<p>Double damn.</p>
<p>Advocates of expelling the Freedmen openly used racist rhetoric to rally voter support. In tribal leader Darren Buzzard’s 2007 email, he urged Cherokees, “Don’t let black freedmen back you into a corner. PROTECT CHEROKEE CULTURE FOR OUR CHILDREN. FOR OUR DAUGHTER[S] . . . FIGHT AGAINST THE INFILTRATION.&#8221;</p>
<p>Buzzard and others on his side of this issue contend that such inflammatory language is a matter of tribal pride, not racism. But proponents of the Freedmen cause, like professional genealogist and author <a href="http://www.afrigeneas.com/forume/index.cgi?md=read;id=16724">Angela Walton-Raji</a>, declared, “It is the blackness of the Freedmen descendants that is despised, NOT the love of those with Cherokee blood.”</p>
<p><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-3357" style="margin: 10px; border: 4px solid black;" title="indian-casino-gaming" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/indian-casino-gaming.png" alt="" width="224" height="176" /></p>
<p>And boy is that Cherokee blood valuable. Even Buzzard knows that. In his email, he also cautioned his Cherokee tribesmen, saying, “They will suck you dry.” The ‘they’ Buzzard referred to were the Freedmen. But suck them dry of what, exactly?</p>
<p>Maybe Buzzard was referring to the Cherokee Nation’s share in the 20-plus-<strong><em>billion</em></strong>-dollar-a-year American Indian gaming industry. Or maybe he was talking about the estimated $300 million of funds that the Cherokee Nation receives annually from the federal government. That’s right. Every year. $300 million. From your democracy-loving, tax-paying pockets.</p>
<p>Luckily, some folks at the Congressional Black Caucus pulled the Cherokee Nation’s card on trying to have its cake and eat it too. In 2007, Rep. Diane Watson of California and several other Black Caucus members introduced a bill that sought to sever the Cherokee Nation’s federal recognition, strip the Cherokee Nation of their $300 million-a-year federal bankroll, and stop the Cherokee Nation’s gaming operations if the tribe failed to honor the Treaty of 1866.</p>
<p>In other words, Diane <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Counting_coup">counted coup</a> on that ass.</p>
<p>The Cherokees’ reply to the bill was essentially, ‘Why are you picking on us, when everyone else is doing it too?’ The official response from then Chief Chad Smith claimed that the bill was “in retaliation for this fundamental principle that is shared by more than 500 other Indian tribes.” In a compromise between Congressional Black Caucus members and their American Indian counterparts, the bill was later modified to allow the Cherokee Nation to continue receiving federal funding as long as some settlement is reached in lawsuits concerning the Freedmen’s citizenship.</p>
<p>As of the writing of this post, at least one of those lawsuits is still pending, and will be heard in a Washington, D.C. court beginning Tuesday, September 20. Attorneys are asking a judge to restore voting rights for the ousted Cherokee Freedmen in time for the September 24 tribal election for Principal Chief. That lawsuit will mark another – and possibly the final – chapter in the Black Freedman of the Cherokee Nation’s fight for citizenship.</p>
<p>Yet even now, the brazenly exclusionary and racist dialogue regarding ‘outsider Indians’ continues. In a post dated June 14, 2011 on the Native American news and entertainment site Indianz.com, Wambli Sina Win, an individual who has held positions in both Native and U.S. legal systems, including Tribal Judge for the Oglala Sioux Tribal Court, an Assistant U.S. Attorney, and legal Instructor for the U.S. Indian Police Academy, writes why ‘<a href="http://64.38.12.138/News/2011/001968.asp">Tribes should protect their Indian bloodline</a>”:</p>
<blockquote><p>“Have you ever seen a wild buffalo on its own, seek out another species with which to mate when there are other wild buffalo around? If the buffalo have sense enough to stay with its own kind, why is it so difficult for our young Lakota men and women…?”</p>
<p>“This was a choice by the minimum blood’s ancestors to breed the Indian blood out and to diminish the bloodline.”</p>
<p>“We don’t need parasites who contribute nothing to our people enjoying the benefits of what our ancestors fought and died to protect.”</p></blockquote>
<p>Though Win’s treatise on racial purity doesn’t specifically mention blacks or the Cherokee Freedmen (ironically enough, her ire is directed mostly towards mixed-race White and Mexican Indians), it doesn’t take much of an imagination to infer that they probably aren’t excluded from her perceived threats to a pure Indian heritage. And clearly, her sentiments aren’t so shocking or outmoded that Indianz.com felt that their readers would be in the least offended by them.</p>
<p>But leaving issues of race aside, there are several other issues about the Cherokee Freedmen story that deserve serious scrutiny:</p>
<p><strong>The Issues of Sovereignty and Democracy</strong></p>
<p>The Cherokee Nation contends that the US government should have no say in who they decide to grant citizenship to, because they are a sovereign nation with their own government and laws and whatnot. A valid point. At least, it <em>would</em> be a valid point had the Cherokee Nation not shot itself in the foot on the issue of sovereignty when it filed lawsuits against individual Freedmen descendants in Federal court back in 2009. In doing so, the Cherokees willfully pierced the sovereign veil. So now the US courts actually <em>do</em> have a right to be all up in their sovereign business.</p>
<p>The Cherokees also argue that they should be able to change their Constitution. But their 1866 treaty with the US says otherwise. The treaty states that the Bureau of Indian Affairs (BIA) must approve amendments to the Cherokee Constitution. The Cherokee voted a few years back to remove the requirement for BIA approval, but in a mobius-loop of logic, that vote isn’t valid unless the BIA approves the decision that it shouldn’t be able to approve such decisions. Yeeeah.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><strong>The Civil Rights Issue</strong></p>
<p>The US has declared embargos, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sun_City_(song)">sung songs</a>, and even gone to war against other sovereign nations that have committed similar acts of disenfranchisement and discrimination against their citizens. Not only are the Cherokees committing these acts, they’re doing it on US soil and they’re doing with $300 million dollars of annual federal funds. Now <em>that’s</em> gangsta.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><strong>The Moral Issue</strong></p>
<p>Many members of the Cherokee Nation rightfully claim that America has a lasting moral debt to American Indians for effectively swindling them out of their lands using largely genocidal tactics; Yet, the Cherokee Nation is now attempting to skip out on the moral debt it owes – and previously agreed to pay &#8211; for the reprehensible and genocidal practice that was slavery.</p>
<p>Insert pot and kettle reference here.</p>
<p><strong> </strong></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><strong>The &#8216;Why Do these People Care?&#8217; Issue</strong></p>
<p>Actually, I’m not sure if this <em>is </em>an issue. But my Facebook friend who originally shared the MSNBC article posed this question to me:</p>
<p>“You ask great questions especially in regards to the Civil Rights aspects but I have a greater question, why would one group of people who were enslaved not only by Europeans but by these same native groups they want to cling too, want to be associated in any way with them? If you have no real cultural tie to them what&#8217;s the big fuss?”</p>
<p><a href="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/CherokeeDiversity.png"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-3363" style="margin: 10px; border: 4px solid black;" title="CherokeeDiversity" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/CherokeeDiversity.png" alt="" width="270" height="186" /></a>As far as I’m concerned, a victim of oppression or injustice doesn’t need to have a good reason for wanting to not be oppressed or… er… injusticed.  Yet if I wanted to speculate on a reason, I’d readily turn to <a href="http://www.columbia.edu/cu/ccbh/mxp/Souls.The_Unfinished_Dialogue.pdf">Martin Luther King</a> or <a href="http://www.theatlantic.com/past/docs/unbound/flashbks/black/mcgillbh.htm">W.E.B. DuBois</a> and their respective debates with Malcolm X and Booker T. Washington on the issues of black integration during the Civil Rights and Reconstruction eras.</p>
<p>But again, thanks to the amazingness of the Internets, I don’t have to speculate. I can get perspectives from those directly affected by the issue. Like this quote from a Cherokee Freedman who was interviewed in 1996 by anthropologist <a href="http://www.ithaca.edu/hs/depts/anthro/facstaff/kbhansen/docs/namindians/cherokee.pdf">Circe Sturm</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>“It is ridiculous to allow White people to take advantage of Indian programs because they have blood on a tribal roll a hundred years ago, when a Black person who suffers infinitely more discrimination and needs the aid more is denied it because his Indian ancestry is overshadowed by his African ancestry&#8230;.  Either the  descendants  of  freedmen  should  be  allowed  to take advantage  of benefits,  or the federal government,  not  these cliquish  tribes,  should  set  new  standards for who  is  an  Indian-and  save  [themselves]  some  money.”</p></blockquote>
<p>…and this snippet from an <a href="http://www.npr.org/2010/11/30/131696685/-Black-Indians-Explore-Challenges-Of-Hidden-Heritage">NPR interview with Shonda Buchanan</a>, a Freedman descendant whose visible blackness has gotten her harassed at tribal celebrations where mixed-race, lighter-skinned Cherokees were fully welcomed:</p>
<blockquote><p>“It&#8217;s who I am. I don&#8217;t know, sometimes I feel like, you know, I&#8217;m going to sit at that counter. I&#8217;m going to drink out of that water fountain, you know? This is a heritage that my people have. And I wasn&#8217;t raised on a reservation, but I was raised knowing I was black and Indian.”</p></blockquote>
<p>… or this perspective, appropriately listed under the heading ‘<em>Why’</em> on the <a href="http://www.freedmen5tribes.com/Why.htm">Freedmen’s website</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>“It seems inconceivable that in the 21<sup>st</sup> century, anyone would have the concept that an individual with some African ancestry should only be able to claim that ancestry. This is not the case with other individuals of mixed ancestry; no one such as an individual with Chinese-Korean heritage or a Choctaw-Chickasaw heritage has to pretend he only has one lineage or should learn about one of his 2 heritages. The &#8220;one drop of blood concept&#8221;, obliterating all other ancestry only exists for people of African descent.  Furthermore, many people of black-Indian ancestry have more knowledge of their Indian ancestors than their ancestors who lived in Africa or who originally arrived in the United States.”</p></blockquote>
<p>***</p>
<p>Most people prefer plots that are easy to follow. We like clear delineations of who is the good guy and who is the bad<a href="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/post-racial-stereotypes.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-3365 alignright" style="margin: 10px; border: 4px solid black;" title="post-racial-stereotypes" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/post-racial-stereotypes.jpg" alt="post-racial-stereotypes" width="256" height="152" /></a> guy, and we especially like it if those delineations match our long-held perceptions of bad guys and good guys. It’s for this reason that most people seem to only be comfortable dealing with issues of race in terms of black and white. But the lingering spectre of racism – particularly institutionalized racism – is much more nuanced, much more complex today. In our allegedly post-racial society, we’ve at least <em>identified</em> if not done away with most of the glaringly racist issues concerning blacks and whites in the United States, but as they say, the devil’s in the details. There are a myriad of these ‘long tail’ racial injustices and race-based inequalities – like that of the <a href="http://www.npr.org/2011/09/15/140428359/making-it-in-the-u-s-more-than-just-hard-work">racial wealth gap</a>, or the troubling <a title="Troy Davis case" href="http://www.11alive.com/news/article/205972/3/The-case-of-Troy-Davis-A-timeline-of-events" target="_blank">case of Troy Davis</a>, or even the treatment of <a href="http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=99220519">minorities in Europe</a> as recently highlighted by London’s riots – that still remain and still deserve our attentions. But, rest assured, they will not be easy to fix. Mainly because the longer a sticky issue has been around, the harder it is to unstick once you finally do get around to fixing it. And these issues have been around for hundreds and hundreds of years.</p>
<p>For now, the curious case of the Cherokee Freedmen issue remains unsolved, and the even curiouser questions keep pinging around in my little head:</p>
<p><em>How can the Cherokee Nation decide to be sovereign when it wants to make its own laws, but relinquish its sovereignty when it wants to use the US justice system to enforce Cherokee laws that are in direct opposition to the laws of the US?</em></p>
<p><em>How is it moral, ethical, or legal for the Cherokee Nation to give the Freedmen citizenship and then take it back when it’s more financially or politically convenient for them to do so?</em></p>
<p>You know, now that I think about it, there’s a term for people who do things like that.</p>
<p>But I won’t say it. ‘Cause that… would be racist.</p>
<p>cheers,</p>
<p>k</p>
<p><strong>Want to get involved in the story?</strong></p>
<p><a href="http://www.freedmen5tribes.com/Help.htm">Support the Cherokee Freedmen</a></p>
<p>Get more info on the <a href="http://www.dcd.uscourts.gov/dcd/">September 20 Cherokee Freedmen trial</a></p>
<p>Follow the upcoming <a href="http://www.cherokee.org/OurGovernment/Commissions/ElectionCommission/32611/Information.aspx">Cherokee Nation election</a></p>
<p>Read more about the history of <a href="http://www.amazon.com/s?ie=UTF8&amp;x=0&amp;ref_=nb_sb_ss_i_0_11&amp;y=0&amp;field-keywords=black%20indians&amp;url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&amp;sprefix=black%20india&amp;_encoding=UTF8&amp;tag=bonvonli-20&amp;linkCode=ur2&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=390957">Black Indians in the US</a><img style="border: none !important; margin: 0px !important;" src="https://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=bonvonli-20&amp;l=ur2&amp;o=1" border="0" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></p>


   
 
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		<title>how to watch television &#8211; tips #2, #3, and #4: put your tv in its place</title>
		<link>http://www.bonvivantonline.com/2010/09/01/how-to-watch-television-tips-2-3-and-4-put-your-tv-in-its-place/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bonvivantonline.com/2010/09/01/how-to-watch-television-tips-2-3-and-4-put-your-tv-in-its-place/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 01 Sep 2010 15:50:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>ksolo</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[“If you read a lot of books you are considered well read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you&#8217;re not considered well viewed.” ~Lily Tomlin In keeping with the series of posts about the evils of television I started a couple of weeks back&#8230; wait. No. Let&#8217;s clarify a couple of things before [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote><p>“If you read a lot of books you are considered well read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you&#8217;re not considered well viewed.”<br />
~Lily Tomlin</p></blockquote>
<p>In keeping with the series of posts about the evils of television I started a couple of weeks back&#8230; wait. No. Let&#8217;s clarify a couple of things before we get too far along with these.</p>
<p>I don&#8217;t actually consider TV to be evil at all. After reading my first post on the topic, a friend of mine expressed some concern that I had morphed into one of these staunch anti-TV nazis and that I was gearing up for multi-week rant about television&#8217;s role in unraveling the fabric of modern society.</p>
<p>Rest assured, Dear Reader, that I enjoy vegging out in front of the tube as much as the average American. I also realize that I often get stuck for hours longer than I originally anticipated and may end up missing out on more beneficial forms of entertainment if I&#8217;m not careful. It&#8217;s a topic that has come up more than once within my circle of associates, so I thought I&#8217;d share my own thoughts on the matter for anyone else who might be interested. Sheesh. Get off my back, already. <img src='http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':-)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
<p>Now, where were we? Oh yes.</p>
<p>Let&#8217;s delve into my next 3 tips for how to watch television more responsibly. I decided to group these all together because they have a common theme &#8211; where you keep your TV has a big influence on how much you watch it. Oh, and in case you&#8217;re just joining our regularly scheduled b<a href="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/how-to-watch-televison-234.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-2969" style="margin: 10px;" title="how-to-watch-televison-234" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/how-to-watch-televison-234-300x112.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="112" /></a>log posts, you might also want to check out <a title="turn off your tv - you are being remotely controlled" href="http://www.bonvivantonline.com/2010/08/08/turn-off-your-tv-%e2%80%93-you-are-being-remotely-controlled/" target="_blank">the first in this series of tips</a>.</p>
<h1>How to Watch Television &#8211; Tip #2</h1>
<p><strong>Take the TV out of your front room.</strong> In many homes, one of the first things you see when you walk in the front door is a TV. Just over the threshold lies this big hulking object, sitting front and center, just begging to be touched or turned on. See,that even sounds inappropriate, doesn’t it? Consider assigning your TV to a room that isn’t the main room of the house.</p>
<h1>How to Watch Television &#8211; Tip #3</h1>
<p><strong>Don’t have a TV in every room of the house</strong>. There should be some place (other than the bathroom) that you can sit in the house where there is no TV to potentially distract you. If you’ve got a TV in every room, consider gifting at least one to a friend, donating it to a charity, or selling it on Craigslist.</p>
<h1>How to Watch Television &#8211; Tip #4</h1>
<p><strong>Don’t make the TV the central focus of the room.</strong> Most people plan the design of the room around the TV – all of the furniture is arranged around the television as a central focus point. As soon as you sit down, you feel as if you’re automatically expected to watch the television, so you do. Try placing the TV off-center or storing it in an armoire, entertainment center or behind a curtain so you can close off the TV when it’s not in use. Yes, that means you may have to slightly shift the furniture or walk across the room to unveil the TV before tuning in. But you&#8217;ll transform turning on the TV into a mini-production, instead of an easy default activity. In turn you might feel less compelled to watch the tube just because it’s there.</p>
<p>cheers,<br />
k</p>


   
 
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		<title>turn off your tv – you are being remotely controlled</title>
		<link>http://www.bonvivantonline.com/2010/08/08/turn-off-your-tv-%e2%80%93-you-are-being-remotely-controlled/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bonvivantonline.com/2010/08/08/turn-off-your-tv-%e2%80%93-you-are-being-remotely-controlled/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 08 Aug 2010 22:04:37 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>ksolo</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[dinner and a movie]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[social commentary]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bonvivantonline.com/?p=2874</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[News flash. Your TV is a remote control device. The irony of that statement struck me the first time I watched Putney Swope &#8211; you know, that movie I told you about last week? While we sit in our homes using that little handheld clicker to control the television, advertisers in far away places are [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/kicking-television.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-2891 aligncenter" title="kicking-television" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/kicking-television-300x225.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="225" /></a></p>
<p>News flash. Your TV is a remote control device. The irony of that statement struck me the first time I watched <a title="Watch Putney Swope" href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000RI5J06?ie=UTF8&amp;tag=bonvonli-20&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=390957&amp;creativeASIN=B000RI5J06" target="_blank">Putney Swope</a> &#8211; you know, that <a title="movies to watch: putney swope" href="http://www.bonvivantonline.com/2010/07/21/movies-to-watch-putney-swope/">movie I told you about last week</a>?</p>
<p>While we sit in our homes using that little handheld clicker to control the television, advertisers in far away places are sitting around their boardrooms making decisions that they hope will allow them to influence and control our thought patterns, emotional responses, behaviors and actions.</p>
<p>Of course, this isn’t really a newsflash at all, is it? We know that advertisements and all sorts of subliminal messages are being streamed over the tube for the sole purpose of influencing us to buy something that’s for sale. But does that render us completely helpless? Is there no way for us to regain control of our TVs or our minds?</p>
<p>I suppose you could eliminate TV from your life altogether. Several of my friends don’t own a TV or watch one regularly. But for many, total TV elimination is impractical. And despite all of the crazy stuff happening on TV these days, it’s still a primary source for news, local information, and quality educational content.</p>
<p>So if we can’t get rid of our TVs, how can we at least be more mindful of how, when, and where we watch in order to limit television&#8217;s influence over our thoughts and behavior? I started thinking about it and jotting down some ideas, and before I knew it, I had a pretty decent list of tips for more responsible TV viewing. Instead of bombarding you with them all in one huge post, I thought I&#8217;d spread them out over a series of posts entitled &#8220;How to Watch Television&#8221;. It&#8217;s not like you have time to read them in one sitting anyway, right? Your favorite TV show is about to come on. <img src='http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_wink.gif' alt=';-)' class='wp-smiley' /> .</p>
<p>Here&#8217;s my first tip for making sure you don’t over-feed the idiot box.</p>
<h1><strong>How to Watch Television – Tip #1</strong></h1>
<p><strong>Don’t watch TV immediately upon waking or just before going to bed.</strong></p>
<p>These are times when the mind is at its most impressionable state. The line between the subconscious and conscious is blurred <a style="float: right; margin: 10px;" href="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/by-the-warm-glow-of-the-television.jpg"><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-2914" title="by the warm glow of the television" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/by-the-warm-glow-of-the-television.jpg" alt="" width="240" height="160" /></a>during sleep, so in those times of transition into and out of the sleeping state, your mind is more open to suggestion in the form of images, sounds, etc.  Just watch the movie <em>Inception</em>, and you&#8217;ll see what I&#8217;m talking about.</p>
<p>If for some reason you must watch TV during those times – be mindful of the programming you select. Choose nature or educational programs over news, politics, or dramatic programming. While there are still advertisements sandwiched into the program breaks, the programs themselves tend to be more neutral. Another good option is to watch programming in another language. This can be a sort of ‘passive exercise’ for your brain. Even better, instead of watching TV when you transition from sleeping to waking,  limit your TV time to when you transition from work to home.</p>
<p>cheers,</p>
<p>k</p>
<p>photo: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/dhammza/88644497/" target="_blank">kicking television</a>, by <a title="dhammza on Flickr" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/dhammza/" target="_blank">dhammza </a></p>
<p>photo: <a title="by the warm glow of the television" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/domesticknitter/3347461502/" target="_blank">by the warm glow of the television</a>, by <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/domesticknitter/" target="_blank">Heather Durdil</a></p>


   
 
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		<title>how to lose like a winner</title>
		<link>http://www.bonvivantonline.com/2010/08/01/how-to-lose-like-a-winner/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bonvivantonline.com/2010/08/01/how-to-lose-like-a-winner/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 01 Aug 2010 20:54:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>ksolo</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[recipes for life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[social commentary]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bonvivantonline.com/?p=2900</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A couple of weekends ago, I got invited to watch a friend’s daughter compete in the National American Miss pageant. I’ve known this young lady since she was a toddler, and over the years I’ve watched her blossom into an awesome little woman. She’s bright, energetic, savvy, and beautiful to boot. You know, one of [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a style="float: left; margin: 10px;" href="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/total_loser.jpg"><img class="alignnone size-medium wp-image-2901" title="total_loser" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/total_loser-268x300.jpg" alt="" width="268" height="300" /></a></p>
<p>A couple of weekends ago, I got invited to watch a friend’s daughter compete in the National American Miss pageant. I’ve known this young lady since she was a toddler, and over the years I’ve watched her blossom into an awesome little woman. She’s bright, energetic, savvy, and beautiful to boot. You know, one of those kids that makes you feel confident about what the next generation will be able to do with their infinite potential. So I was thrilled to join her parents in the audience to hoot and holler like a madwoman whenever she appeared on the stage.</p>
<p>That night, we watched all the contestants do their opening numbers and have their individual moments in the spotlight. We also watched watch as girl after girl got picked for various and sundry titles – Miss Congeniality, Most Likely to be a Top Model, Most Likely to End Up as a Trophy Wife and Get One Helluva Divorce Settlement when the Dog of a Husband Gets Caught Cheating (or something like that). Even with all her charm, poise, and intelligence, our girl didn’t get a single trophy or accolade, and she didn’t even get to move on to the next round of competition. Needless to say, we were crushed. She, of course, was even more crushed. After she’d changed back into her street clothes, she joined us to head to the car. She held up pretty well for a few moments, then the tears came. “It isn’t fair,” she cried. “They weren’t as good as me!” she protested. And we agreed, clucking over her and consoling her like dutiful supporters. There wasn’t any use in trying to rationalize the outcome of the pageant to her. Even if there <em>had</em> been a rational explanation, it likely wouldn’t have made a dent on her emotional state. So, I thought that the words her mother offered her were the best that could be said at that moment. She simply told her daughter, “Baby, it wasn’t your time.”</p>
<p>No doubt, losing sucks. <em>Hard</em>. Especially when it’s something you’ve worked hard to get, or something you feel like you’re naturally more qualified to have. So when you don’t land that job, or you get passed over by that girl or guy you had your heart set on, or someone else snags that grand opportunity that you know was meant for you, it makes you want to scream at the top of your lungs, “It’s not fair! They weren’t as good as me!” It’s irritating as hell to see the lesser-qualified get your moment in the spotlight, with the crowd cheering and the fair maiden planting a wreath of laurel leaves on their unworthy head. When it happens more than once, you may stop screaming outwardly and start whispering inwardly to yourself: “Maybe I’m not good enough. Maybe I don’t know what I’m doing. Maybe no one will ever want me.” Even the most confident and self-assured person has their moments of uncertainty when met with a consistent stream of losses.</p>
<p>I thought back to one of the girls in the pageant who had advanced to the next round that evening. It was her fifth year in the competition, and she’d never made it beyond the first round before. Yet she kept showing up every year. Kept donning the glitzy gown, kept flashing the perfect camera-ready smile, and kept being sent home with nothing to show for her efforts. I wondered what she must have felt like after two years of not winning. After year three? I wondered how she even mustered up the energy and optimism it took to come back for one more chance at winning, though she was a repeat loser. By the colloquial definition, this girl was insane. She kept doing the same thing and expecting a different result. But eventually, after five long years, she did get a different result.</p>
<p>So how exactly do you distinguish the insane person from the winner-to-be?</p>
<blockquote class="right">
<h4>&#8220;Sometimes losing is a wake-up call in disguise, a universal conspiracy that’s letting you know that you’re chasing the wrong dream&#8230;&#8221;</h4>
</blockquote>
<p>Winners recognize that there may not be any logic to the fact that they lost, but they take the loss as an opportunity for assessment.  A time to prepare themselves for the win that will inevitably come. After a loss, winners ask themselves the following questions:</p>
<p><strong>Am I losing because I’m playing the wrong game?</strong></p>
<p>If you’re going after something that doesn’t align with your purpose or your true values, why would you <em>want</em> to win? Sometimes losing is a wake-up call in disguise, a universal conspiracy that’s letting you know that you’re chasing the wrong dream, and you need to set your eyes on a different, more fitting prize. If you feel certain that what you’re after <em>does</em> align with your purpose, it’s much easier to deal with temporary losses on the way to your goal.</p>
<p><strong>Am I losing because I&#8217;m not yet prepared to win?</strong></p>
<p>If you were to get that job, land that cutie pie, or be granted that opportunity, are you currently prepared to make the most of it? Do you have the skills to maintain the thing you’ve won after you’ve won it? You’ve heard the stories of lottery winners who are penniless only a few years after their big win, because they had no money management skills. It’s almost impossible to believe, but it <a style="float: left; margin: 10px;" href="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/and-the-winner-is.jpg"><img class="alignnone size-medium wp-image-2903" title="and the winner is" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/and-the-winner-is-300x209.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="209" /></a>happens all the time – and not just with the lottery. Winners take time after a loss to continue to hone their skills. They visualize what they’ll need to do after the win to make sure they’re ready to perform when it happens. Winners know that a gift given to the ill-prepared can easily become a curse.</p>
<p><strong>Am I losing because it just isn’t my time?</strong></p>
<p>So you know for sure that you’re after the right thing. And you know that you’re well-prepared to maintain that thing after you’ve won it. So what gives? Why do you keep losing? Well baby, maybe it just isn’t your time. While you’re fuming about how unfair it all is, maybe there’s someone else out there who had just as much right to the ‘big win’ as you did. They may have waited longer or worked harder, or maybe it was simply ‘their time’. Maybe you’re like that year-five winner, and you’ll have to lose many times before you win. Just remember to re-assess, re-equip, and reapply yourself… even if everyone else thinks you’re insane.</p>
<p>As it turns out, our girl made it through the pageant ordeal without too much emotional or ego damage. After a post-pageant dinner out, she was mostly back to normal. The following week, she got an unexpected phone call. It came from a talent scout who’d seen her at the pageant and wanted to know if she was available for other opportunities.</p>
<p>So let that be a lesson to all you losers out there. The next time you lose, go ahead and have a good cry, check to make sure the makeup is still ok, then treat yourself to something tasty.</p>
<p>And know this… your day is coming. Maybe even sooner than you think.</p>
<p>cheers,</p>
<p>k</p>
<p>photo: <a title="total loser" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/bamzin/1367469508/">total loser</a> by <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/bamzin/" target="_blank">bamzin</a></p>
<p>photo: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/notsogoodphotography/2130589515/" target="_blank">&#8230;and the winner is</a> by <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/notsogoodphotography/">notsogoodphotography</a></p>


   
 
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		<title>what’s next – tips for overcoming stagnation</title>
		<link>http://www.bonvivantonline.com/2010/07/26/what%e2%80%99s-next-%e2%80%93-tips-for-overcoming-stagnation/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bonvivantonline.com/2010/07/26/what%e2%80%99s-next-%e2%80%93-tips-for-overcoming-stagnation/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 26 Jul 2010 17:43:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>ksolo</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[recipes for work]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[doing what you love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[social commentary]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bonvivantonline.com/?p=2876</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Making your own money – and by that I mean, not from a typical 9 to 5, but from something you created and you own – is like a drug. Once you’ve had even the littlest taste of it, you’ll always want it again. Be careful what you wish for when you wish to be [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/whats-next.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-2881  aligncenter" title="whats-next" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/whats-next-300x199.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="199" /></a></p>
<p>Making your own money – and by that I mean, not from a typical 9 to 5, but from something you created and you own – is like a drug. Once you’ve had even the littlest taste of it, you’ll always want it again. Be careful what you wish for when you wish to be your own boss. You might get hooked for life.</p>
<p>I say be careful because it’s not an easy path. It’s a #@$&amp;! scary ride. But… it’s a ride that changes you for the better. You learn to become bigger than yourself, if that makes any sense. You learn to use your strengths and your weaknesses to your advantage. As master of your own work domain, you have to know yourself well and still continually try to outsmart yourself, to outdo your last move. That’s innovation. That’s growth. That’s ultimately sustainability. Because if you’re always thinking about where you’ll get your next entrepreneurial fix; if you’re constantly asking yourself, ‘what next?’ you’ll have an answer when someone else comes asking the same thing of you.</p>
<p>In business, that ‘someone else’ is your customers, your employees, your partners, your teachers and mentors. When those people come asking, ‘what next?’ you’d better have an answer. If you don’t, you’ll be cheating yourself and them. Or worse…. you’ll become stagnant, and ultimately irrelevant.</p>
<p>“What next?” is a question that I’ve been continually pondering for the last few months. I’ve been an independent freelancer for almost a year now, and have had plenty of ups and downs, direction changes and lots of opportunities to test different approaches in marketing, selling and delivering my services. I finally feel like I’ve reached a level of comfort with the ambiguity and the sometimes unpredictable nature of self-employment, and I’m preparing to kick off some new projects and partnerships that will continue to propel me down paths I want to travel. I recently shared one of those projects with you, and I’m looking forward to sharing the others as they progress.</p>
<p>In the meantime, I’d like to pass along some highlights from a blog post entitled ‘<a href="http://www.deanlforbes.com/dlf/2010/02/how-to-overcome-stagnation.html" target="_blank">How to Overcome Stagnation’ by Dean L. Forbes</a>. Work &#8211; whether done for yourself or for someone else – is one of those areas that it’s extremely easy to become stagnant in, and Dean has provided some excellent insights for recognizing the symptoms of stagnation and developing strategies to deal with it.</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">Symptoms of Stagnation:</span></strong></p>
<ul>
<li>Lack of focus – feeling scattered and unsure of the goals you’ve set</li>
<li>Indecisiveness – unable to make a decision because every option is too risky and/or impossible</li>
<li>Doubt – feelings of self-doubt, lack of confidence in your skills and abilities</li>
<li>Hopelessness – inability to see the silver lining, the upside, the light at the end of the tunnel</li>
<li>Cynicism –feeling like the cards are stacked against you, that everyone (especially the ones who ‘don’t deserve it’) is getting ahead except you</li>
<li>Depression – lack of energy or will to do anything positive, productive, or progressive</li>
</ul>
<p>Like any emotional or mental state, stagnation is temporary. The amount of time spent in a state of stagnation depends on your willingness to take the right actions to move beyond that state. Forbes recommends the following right actions to overcome stagnation.</p>
<p><strong><span style="text-decoration: underline;">5 Ways to Overcome Stagnation:</span></strong></p>
<ol>
<li>Re-evaluate your core values – Make sure that the principles you wish to live by – your own personal definition of ‘the good life’ – are intact. Make a list of the things in life that really matter to you and be sure that your daily activities and decisions reflect that.</li>
<li>Redefine your mission – What is your purpose? What are you here for? What do you feel that you were uniquely created to do? You may already have an idea in your head. Take some time to reflect on and re-envision this mission.</li>
<li><a href="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/road-to-somewhere.jpg"><img class="size-full wp-image-2882 alignleft" style="margin: 10px 30px 10px 0px;" title="road-to-somewhere" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/road-to-somewhere.jpg" alt="" width="200" height="204" /></a>Change your mission – Does the mission you previously envisioned for yourself no longer make sense? Maybe it’s time to find a new mission.</li>
<li>Change your circle – If you’re on a journey to somewhere, your travelling companions can make or break the trip for you. It can be difficult to change or sever associations, but if you find out that people in your circle aren’t interested in going where you’re headed, you’ll all be much better off going your separate ways.</li>
<li>Take a different route – There’s more than one way to reach a given goal. Maybe the path you’re on isn’t the one that’s going to work for you. There’s no shame in changing directions or scrapping what you thought was a well-planned route. What matters is that you keep moving towards your ultimate destination.</li>
</ol>
<p>If you’re looking for more help dealing with stagnation, here are a few of my favorite stagnation-killing books:</p>
<div id="attachment_2877" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 109px"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0143038419?ie=UTF8&amp;tag=bonvonli-20&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=390957&amp;creativeASIN=0143038419"><img class="size-full wp-image-2877  " style="margin: 10px 45px 10px 10px;" title="eat-pray-love-book-amazon" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/eat-pray-love-book-amazon.jpg" alt="" width="99" height="160" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert</p></div>
<div id="attachment_2879" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 141px"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B001TKYOL6?ie=UTF8&amp;tag=bonvonli-20&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=390957&amp;creativeASIN=B001TKYOL6"><img class="size-full wp-image-2879 " style="margin: 10px 30px 10px 15px;" title="the-artists-way-book" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/the-artists-way-book.jpg" alt="" width="131" height="160" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">The Artist&#39;s Way by Julia Cameron</p></div>
<p><div id="attachment_2878" class="wp-caption alignleft" style="width: 126px"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0936663324?ie=UTF8&amp;tag=bonvonli-20&amp;linkCode=as2&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=390957&amp;creativeASIN=0936663324 "><img class="size-full wp-image-2878" style="margin: 10px 10px 10px 15px;" title="pigs-eat-wolves-book" src="http://bonvivantonline.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/pigs-eat-wolves-book.jpg" alt="" width="116" height="160" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">Pigs Eat Wolves by Charles Bates</p></div><br />
<br clear="all" /></p>
<p>photo by: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/crystalflickr/"><strong>Crystl</strong></a></p>
<p>cheers,<br />
k</p>


   
 
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